The Walls Come Tumbling Down.

People talk a lot about being 'overwhelmed'.  I feel like this word is frequently misused by the general public.  I'm not talking about you, per se, because I may not know you.  But I think some people use this term when they really mean overcome, or frustrated or just busy.

I personally know a lot about feeling overwhelmed.  Overwhelmed is when you feel as though walls are constantly crashing in around you and all you can do is curl into the fetal position and try to block out the noise... but even then, at least if there were crashing walls you would be the victim of some horrible accident, your peers wouldn't hold you accountable for your inability to get that project done, your teachers would give you extensions with a look of sympathy on their faces.  

Instead, I have the kind of overwhelmed feeling that happens only on the inside where no one can see the crashing walls of my own mistakes.  I am fully responsible for my crashing walls and have to take more then just responsibility.  I have to take actions.  Push back against those walls till they stand strong, sweep away the debris, take a deep breath and take it one step at a time.

A little over a week ago our final film project was assigned.  I ordered my film.  It didn't come and it didn't come.  I called the appropriate numbers, and low and behold, it had been 'delivered' but had never shown up.  So.  It's (last) Saturday. I have one role of indoor film that the school provided.  We shoot the last scene of my film.  This works out alright since I have yet to find my second actress anyway.

I am sent two new roles of film by Kodak.  They arrive Friday.  Still no second actress.  As we say in the biz - I'm screwed.

Meanwhile... let's back up a bit.  Tuesday, I go out to shoot some stuff.  Goes fine.  Wednesday I try to capture the footage... not so fine.  My electromagnetic field strikes again and the machines don't want to co-operate.  I can't turn in my project.

For those keeping score: I am now 1 paper, 1 video, 1 sound project, 1 take home quiz behind... something for every class.  Not to mention running behind on the Film project and a second paper (both of which I have plenty of time to complete if I act fast).

Bringing us to today.  I am at school finally capturing the footage for my video project as well as the documentary for the stewardship campaign (oh, had I forgotten to mention that one?  being shown next Sunday, the 26th).  Next I'll try and get a sound room so I can take care of that pesky sound project and get the sound for one of my interviews.  Then I'm going to a little bit of shopping (necessities and a present for someone who may have a holiday in their honor coming up).

So, I have been feeling very overwhelmed, but I think I am finally pressuring those walls into standing themselves back up again.  It helps to have some stress relief too, so I am going out to karaoke tonight to sing and burn off a little steam.  Should be fun - what's that like again?